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Carrie Burdine's Testimony

I was introduced to Jesus when I was roughly about 13 years old. My family went to church on a regular basis and I had a personal relationship with Jesus but I never made him my Lord. Because of my parent's behavior and attitude on a lot of different issues my faith was lost and I became
discouraged with God. I became your normal depressed, acting-out teenager who then as a young adult was wild and crazy. drinking, doing minor drugs, and sex were my hobbies. Even though I was living a life full of sin and
bragging about it-there was darkness I didn't know how to escape from.

From a distance I could hear a calling coming from the Lord. By this time I was newly married with a new baby so I felt eager to answer the Lord's calling.

For the next 2 years, I struggled hard. Even though I accepted Christ into my life, I found no joy. I was sad and depressed. Instead of trying to make myself right with the lord, I chose to be the Holy Spirit (the spirit
in us that guides us right from wrong) for my husband and other people.

This was not making me happy, nor the people in my life. I found myself slipping back into that dark life I once escaped from. I began cheating on my husband and lying to him about it, and eventually my husband left me.

My friends all abandoned me. "But, I'm a strong woman, I can take care of myself," I thought. So I took me and my 2 children half-way across the world, only to find myself deeper into my darkness. I got involved with a married man who was happy to be sinning, a job I hated, and a barely there relationship with anyone I truly cared about. I was mad at the whole world and was getting into fights with people I didn't even know. I was angry about EVERYTHING-decisions I had made, the what-ifs and where my life had
landed me. Once again I heard the calling, but instead of answering it-I just chose to wallow in my own darkness. I dwelled there for what seemed like such a long time. I thought to myself, "I've turned my back on everything I've known: my family, my kids, my friends, my husband, and
most importantly...Jesus. How can I ever go back to him-why would he even want me back after everything I've done. I'm selfish, I'm mean, I've committed adultery repeatedly, I'm a drunk-there is NO way I can go back." but
Jesus would say to me, "I'm here, I love you. Come to me. let me heal you."

Honestly, I hesitated but realized time DOES NOT heal all wounds-Jesus does.

I needed Jesus to fix me-and he has. I was broken like a flower in the rain and was raised again, by the strength of Jesus Christ. I have given my whole self and entire life to the Lord. I have found my place-once and for all-finally!!